What is Counselling?
Counselling is a unique relationship where the counsellor is there just for you, to listen to you as you talk about whatever it is that is troubling you. Counselling is not about giving advice – but about giving time and space for reflection and understanding ourselves better.
Counselling can be many different things – it can provide a space to work through something specific, or it can be an opportunity to work on increasing insight and self awareness. It can be short term and solution focused, or long term and open ended.
Counselling can be a great support in times of change, personal crisis and distress. I have dealt with a wide variety of issues including anxiety, bereavement, depression, low self esteem, work, relationship or family problems, infertility, midlife issues, expressing difficult emotions, eating disorders and abuse.
I am an experienced counsellor, and I work from an integrative, humanistic counselling perspective. The sessions are client led – this means we work at the client’s pace and provide a safe, non judgmental environment for exploring the issues that are troubling you.
I work with both individuals and couples, and have experience of a wide range of issues.
Couples counselling can be helpful to explore different aspects of the relationship such as communication, conflict, adultery, parenting styles, children, blended families or managing the ending of the relationship.
I am particularly interested in menopausal related issues and Boarding School Syndrome – there is further information about these on the Other Areas tab.
Feedback from clients:
- I was both very low and lacking in self confidence when I decided to seek counselling. I was very nervous but Jeffer made me feel welcome, calm and safe. Jeffer has helped me to see the person inside me, acknowledge who I am and most of all to love and accept myself as a worthy individual.
She worked with me at my pace, never rushing or pushing me but at the same time tackling my very sensitive issues with care and diplomacy.
I now feel, thanks to her help and understanding, and the work we did together about events in my past, that I can see things from a different perspective, can take control of my life and recognise my strengths and most of all be happy and fulfilled.
I think I can say that counselling has been one of the most positive things I have ever done in my life and key to that process was Jeffer who I felt walked with me along what seemed at the start a very lonely path but with her encouragement, understanding and guidance helped me to move forward. Jeffer has been simply fantastic.
- Most of us at some point in our lives will be faced with the daunting sight of a crumpled life. The journey we then have to take, is the journey through oneself, which is exciting and scary at the same time.This is the time when I turned to Jeffer, to give me the support, the tools and act as a sounding board through this journey. Thanks to our work, I have grown to know myself better, I have developed self-confidence, honesty with myself and trust in what I can achieve.There have been ups and downs and it hasn’t been easy all the time, but every minute of this journey is worth it for the person that I am now.
- I started going to Jeffer because I was unhappy with an enormous amount in my life. I found myself making the same mistakes over and over and, despite knowing exactly what I wanted to change, I was completely unable to do it. I had no trust in myself and found it hard to be comfortable with other people. I was always assuming I would get “found out” at some point – in personal relationships and at work.Up until very recently, I had always presumed that I could think my way through my problems on my own. I prided myself on being honest with myself, but in fact it was just self criticism. Having someone completely impartial to talk to was invaluable. I found that I could express myself without restraint and that having an outside view was brilliant. There was a great balance to our discussions between simple conversation and some more structured exercises but I felt that I was invited to explore my own thinking, rather than having it “analysed”. I was helped to gain a sense of perspective and really think about what was making me feel how I felt, rather than battering my head against what seemed like insoluble problems.All our meetings were productive and different and, in a strange way, fun. I identified not just what I was doing that was wrong, but also why I was doing it and I know what to watch out for to stop myself slipping back in to the same ruts. I also have a motto, “care for yourself.” It might seem simple, but I hadn’t managed to work it out in a decade or so of thinking about it on my own.
- I sought counselling shortly after the birth of my son. I felt overwhelmed and some deeply held old anxieties were rearing their ugly heads. The GP had diagnosed post natal depression, I was on medication but there was more to deal with.I had tried to engage in counselling in the past, knowing that some “things” needed to be “dealt with” but had never found anyone I connected with and back then maybe I could just run away. At this point in my life, with a small baby, there was no running away – physically and emotionally, I felt trapped and I was terrified.Jeffer was warm and open and I found it easy to connect with her and be totally honest about what I was feeling.I was able to identify the emotional and behavioural patterns that had characterised my adult life and understand how the issues with my father’s alcoholism and my own substance abuse had impacted on me and on others. Jeffer helped me to see these patterns as changeable rather than fixed and allowed me to forgive myself and my parents and stop punishing myself.We laughed quite a lot along the way which I wasn’t expecting but really helped. Counselling with Jeffer was a real release for me in so many ways, I feel freer now having talked through many things I have never spoken about.I am so thankful that I took the step to seek counselling and found Jeffer. I now feel free in a way that I have never felt before. I did feel a sense of loss when our sessions ended and I do still miss the relationship but this is part of the arrangement and one of the reasons it worked so well for me – everything must come to an end!I now feel able to be true to myself and to my family and to be the mum I know I can be. Life is still really hard at times but I know I can cope with it!Thanks! - Anna